To say that Reichen Lehmkuhl is militant when it comes to raising awareness regarding lifting the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy, would not be an understatement at all.
In fact, it perfectly encapsulates the 36-year-old’s passion for spreading the word on the political hot potato, which he addressed last month in Las Vegas during his appearance at Deployment Vegas. The annual gathering is for gay military men and those who champion them.
Lehmkuhl, who served as a Captain in the Air Force prior to his honorable discharge, has since spent his time in the trenches as a spokesperson for Servicemembers Legal Defense Network and has a flight-themed jewelry line, Flying Naked, with proceeds benefiting the aforementioned organization.
It has been seven years since Lehmkuhl, and then partner Chip Arndt, won “The Amazing Race”; and he is now in the midst of dipping his toe back into the reality TV pool with his appearance on the upcoming LOGO series, “The A List: New York,” which has been likened to Bravo’s popular “Real Housewives” franchise, and features him and his boyfriend Rodiney Santiago in their day-to-day existence.
Lehmkuhl took time out his very busy schedule, which also includes taping of the new series and his starring role in the off-Broadway production of My Big Gay Italian Wedding, to chat with The Rage Monthly about a number of reality-themed topics; from being affiliated as one of its stars to the realism of there being a lifting of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
Seeing as Lehmkuhl has been one of the few LGBT faces to win on a reality competition, we thought we’d get his two cents worth on how these shows represent the community as a whole.
“I think depending on the show, it’s portraying all different sides of the gay community,” he said, “It’s funny, as I get older, I’ve come to learn that there are so many kinds of people who happen to be gay; that you can’t fault any single show for depicting the gay community any single way.
Because who’s to say that straight acting gay people should be more acceptable than feminine acting gay people, or professional gay people should be regarded in a higher esteem than artsy gay people?"
“I’m kind of at the point where I’m non-judgmental about all of the different kinds of gay people that are in the community.”
As far as which of the many reality shows that populate the airwaves, he does have a favorite that he’s partial to, in terms of how the community are showcased on it. “‘The Amazing Race’ has done it the best, because they’ve shown a lot of different kinds of gay people,” he answered.
“They’ve embraced the whole spectrum of the gay community. Our gay watchdog organizations that we have; there’s almost this pressure to show the gay community in a way that might be more acceptable to the straight community,” he explained.
“So that we have a better chance of getting rights, and I’m getting militant in my older age in saying, ‘We should be able to be how we are, and still be respected to have the same rights as everyone else.’ When you’re talking about reality shows, especially ‘The Amazing Race, ‘ I think they applaud that mindset.”
One mindset that may not have Lehmkuhl giving a standing ovation to is the labeling of being a “reality star,” as he has branched out into other avenues of the entertainment field with acting roles, including his turn as Trevor on “Dante’s Cove.”
He explained his connotation of the term. “Ah, reality star,” he said with a laugh. “Someone who has a really hard time getting respect in the legitimate acting world; I think it takes a special kind of person to really stick with it, and try to parlay their reality world fame into things that are more constructive and respected more in the entertainment industry.”
As previously mentioned, he is in the midst of filming “The A List: New York” and is both “totally excited and scared to death” to be swimming back in the waters of reality TV, as this experience is far different than his turn on “The Amazing Race.”
“It’s scary, the cameras are with me all the time,” he stated. “It’s an eight episode series, and we’re shooting for three and a half months; and the show is with me, basically, six days a week and sometimes twelve hours a day." 
“And they’re showing everything,” Lehmkuhl exclaimed. “Viewers of the show are going to see my life, like my family and friends probably haven’t even seen it. It’s so intense, this show, and it’s scary to be opened up like that. But at the same time, it’s so much fun and so exciting.”
As far as the series being similar to the Real Housewives brand, Lehmkuhl feels that it will stand on its own merit.
“It’s definitely a unique show, because it will be the only one that’s totally gay and depicting these six guys’ lives,” he professed.
“You’ll be able to relate to it more, and there’s every kind of gay person on the show – name the kind of guy and he’s on there. I think everyone’s going to have a favorite and everyone’s going to have someone they hate.
And, I think the show will be appealing to a lot of people outside of the gay community, because it’s a kind of social experiment.”
Another aspect that he sees as beneficial is that it’s a great cross-promotional tool for the gay rights causes he supports through appearances on the lecture circuit, as well as highlighting his attempts to eek out time to write a tongue-in-cheek follow-up to his 2006 memoir Here’s What We’ll Say, which he plans to title It Will Be Great Exposure.
“I’m having a time in my life, where I’m not getting the chance to sit down and write,” he recounted. “I’m actually heading to a store right now to buy a desk, so I can sit down and write more.
The first quarter will be my time as a gay officer in the Air Force and everything I went through living a double life, and then I’ll go into meeting Chip, doing “The Amazing Race,” meeting Lance (Bass) and going through a breakup on the grocery store newsstand tabloids.
“I’ve been through some other really hard stuff that I’m going to reveal and open up about, hopefully to help other people who might have gone through the same things.”
And this is the exact reason why he became involved with Deployment Vegas, as he knows first hand about the types of experience the military men have gone through.
“It’s really important for me and I feel so lucky to have been invited by the organization to speak to them,” Lehmkuhl said. “And I know it’s an organization that relates to me and what I’ve been through, and I relate to them and what they’ve been through."
“I think it will benefit me as much as it will benefit them (the men participating). I’ll love getting together with these guys and having that camaraderie with them, and we can all talk and share stories.
To stand before them and tell my story is cool, but I want to hear their stories, as much as they might want to hear mine. When you’re in the military and you’re gay, you withstand emotional torture leading a double life and it’s very difficult.”
If Lehmkuhl had his druthers, and in a perfect world, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” would become a thing of the past. “If I had it my way, I would be best friends with the President and talk him into signing an executive order to stop the discharges immediately,” he proclaimed.
“At two discharges a day, at the rate we’re running, I’d put all those discharges on the shoulders of the President. "We’re really torturing people who are willing to give their lives in their profession; name one other profession where people are willing to give an actual beating heart for that profession,” he stated.
“You’re taking those kinds of honorable people and ripping them from their careers, humiliating them, and everyday we’re doing this to a couple of men and women. It has to stop! In an ideal world, which is not the one we live in, that’s what I would do."
“In the real world, I have high hopes that the Senate will pass this Defense Budget Bill. It’s a lot of work and will take a lot of convincing.”
The A-List: New York will premiere next month on LOGO.
Lt. Dan Choi, the out gay soldier who has been at the front of efforts to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, has re-enlisted in the US army.
